Late-Lee, I’ve been getting “schooled” by my husband—again. This time it wasn’t about how I load the dishwasher or whether towels should be folded in thirds or halves. No, this time it was about buttoning a shirt.
He starts at the bottom and works his way up. I, naturally, start at the top and work my way down. I mean there are more than two ways to skin a cat, right? But more times than I’d like to admit, I get to the bottom and realize I’ve got one button left with no hole to put it in. Every. Single. Time. Then I have to unbutton the whole thing and start over.
Standing there, staring at my crooked shirt, I had a thought: This is exactly what happens when leaders try to lead from the top down without making sure things are aligned.
In schools, we do this more than we realize. We roll out big initiatives, focus on frameworks, timelines, and catchy acronyms. We start at the top. And it sounds solid—until we get to the people closest to the work and realize something doesn’t fit.
It looks good on paper, but it’s misaligned in practice. Just like my shirt, the whole thing ends up a little off. And that’s when we’re faced with a choice: fix it, or pretend not to notice and keep going crooked.
Start from the Bottom
Strong leadership doesn’t start at the top. It starts with the folks closest to the work.
It’s the teacher managing 27 different needs and a pacing guide. Or, the para keeping small group instruction on track. It’s even the cafeteria manager who knows who skipped breakfast. And let’s not forget the coach noticing both instructional gaps and emotional ones.
When we begin by listening—really listening—we build plans that make sense and hold up under pressure.
Check for Alignment
Before you launch something new, take a minute to ask yourself…
Have I talked to the people doing the work? What are they seeing and experiencing? Does this plan make sense at every level—student, teacher, leader, and family? Are we addressing the root cause, or just reacting to a symptom? Have I made space for feedback—and am I actually listening? If I were in the classroom or hallway, would this feel doable?
Sometimes the smartest thing a leader can do is pause and look down—not out of defeat, but to make sure everything lines up. Starting from the bottom might take a little longer, but it saves you from having to redo it all later.
So, late-lee, I’ve been thinking about the many changes my life has had in a very short time. Most of the changes were certainly made after much prayer and consideration, but a few of the changes we are now experiencing seem to have been simply thrown at us. I’m very good at always trying to look at the bright side of things (well…at least most of the time), but it doesn’t mean that I don’t go through moments of analysis, where I may sit and think about what I’m doing and question if I am truly supposed to be where I am. I’ve been seeing my friends post different books they’ve read on Facebook. One (A Purpose Driven Life) caught my attention. I read that book some time ago. I think I’m still searching for the real purpose God has for me.
I ran across a quote that sort of screamed at me on Pinterest. Susan Fales-Hill said, “If you are too comfortable, it’s time to move on. Terrified of what’s next? You are on the right track!” That quote makes me wonder if the mind games playing nonstop in my head late-lee, may very well mean I’m on the right track! My sweet husband calls them snakes! So if I go with his description, then there must be some real rattlers in there having a party! I’m certainly feeling like a square peg trying to fit into a round hole at times late lee, so in keeping with the quote previously shared, I will choose to believe that discombobulated feeling in my head means I’m growing! The fancy word that describes what I am feeling is “state of disequilibrium”. It’s one of the lovely Piaget theories and it happens to us more times than not. We just don’t recognize it as such. For example, when a child is learning to tie his/her shoe, he/she enters that state of disequilibrium while trying to learn new schema for how to tie a shoe. Our children may feel it when they are sitting in classrooms trying to learn new information. They struggle in that learning as they work to make connections to previous learning and build new schema for the concept. In some cases, they simply give up. As adults we may feel it when we start a new job, get a new class of students each year, or when we are simply trying to do something like cook a new recipe. During those times frustration may flow through our veins like medications flowing through an IV. We might throw our hands up in the air and wave the flag of surrender. We might do that…but, we shouldn’t!
So what does all of this really mean? As we go through life, we are going to encounter uncomfortable situations in which we find ourselves learning something new. And, y’all, that’s really a wonderful gift! What you may need to know about me is one of my strengths revealed on my Strengths Finder test is a love of learning. It’s not that I love learning to become an expert. It really means I love the process of learning. Sometimes, though, my schemata connectors seem broken or lack the Velcro or whatever sticky substance they must need because it’s like the knowledge I so eagerly consume, goes in, but doesn’t stick. This makes me go…hmmm! So, how to proceed?
The answer lies in our mindset! I’m a firm believer that you are what you repeatedly think. Did that sink in? REPEATEDLY. THINK. So, if I go through life telling myself I am a square peg and there’s no way I’ll fit in that round hole, I’ll never succeed. But, if I take my experiences and start wrapping them around the flat edges I see myself having sometimes, I’ll begin to see a new shape forming. This new shape has dimension. It is made up of experiences, old learning, new learning, and even happen-chance learning. Little by little the edges begin to morph into a well-rounded sphere.
So, when someone calls you a square peg and tells you – you can’t fit in that round hole, tell the person…”you had better get a shovel, saw, drill or whatever tool you need, because you are going to need a bigger hole because my SQUARE self is going in!”
Get out there and try new things. Don’t stay in one place because it feels comfortable! Growth is often uncomfortable, messy and full of feelings you weren’t expecting…but it’s necessary! (quote taken from MollyHoStudio) Use your gifts and talents to serve others. If you feel that nudge, settle into that urge. Listen to it speak to your heart. Determine if there is good for others that could come from your calling. Then, get after it! Read, learn, and grow regardless of your age. Stay RELEVANT like my former Superintendent told us at a retirement luncheon. (That comment hit me hard!) I have always liked knowing I was helping others and want to leave fingerprints of kindness wherever I can! I’m not sure if I’m currently adding value to my new team yet, but I am so excited to be a part of another wonderful organization that has a heart for people. There are many beautiful acts happening in our different organizations, but you have to have a mindset that allows you to see them! I choose to look at them with glitter in my eyes rather than thorns! 🙂
I love Erma Bombeck’s quote, “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me.” Like I used to tell my daughters when they were involved in sports…walk off the mat or the field with nothing left. Leave all that you had to give there. God, I am working really hard to leave it all here and my friends and family are too!
Rhonda "Late" Lee 