Gratitude for the Prickly Ones

(Part 3 of 4: A Late-Lee Reflection on Leadership and Thankfulness)

I have a fascination with porcupines. I’ve never seen one in the wild, but I’ve lingered a little longer than I should watching them at the zoo. I love their prickly quills! It makes them seem harsh, but in my research, I’ve learned they don’t use them to harm others. They’re only used for protection.

So late-Lee, I’ve been thinking about those little fellas. They remind me of some folks I’ve met along my path in education. Truth be told, they also remind me of myself. Just like most people, porcupines aren’t looking for conflict. They react when they feel unsafe. Gratitude becomes the bridge that helps us approach others gently, seeing their defenses as protection rather than rejection. Some people proudly carry their quills. They’re cautious with their words and careful with their hearts. Sometimes they seem distant, even difficult to approach. But much like the porcupine, their sharp edges aren’t about aggression; they’re about self-preservation. They’ve learned through experience that it’s safer to stay guarded than to risk being hurt.

And yet, porcupines still find ways to connect. They share dens in the cold and settle close enough to feel warmth without piercing one another. There’s something beautiful about that balance of holding onto your protection while still choosing proximity.

In leadership, we cross paths with plenty of porcupines. A teacher who resists feedback. A colleague who’s slow to trust. A parent who comes in ready for a fight. Gratitude should help us pause long enough to see what’s beneath the quills. It reminds us that there’s almost always softness underneath, and a story behind the spikes.

Leader Moves

• Approach the “prickly” moments with curiosity, not judgment.
• Notice when you’re showing your own quills and ask what’s driving that reaction.
• Be grateful for the chance to connect, even if it takes patience and care.

Gratitude doesn’t take away the quills, but it helps us handle them with gentleness. When we choose to look beyond the sharp, we are less likely to see resistance as defiance. When we decide to stay thankful for the connection, we see warmth. When we lead with gratitude, we start to see it as someone’s way of staying safe until trust is earned.

Late-Lee, I’ve learned that even the prickly ones (especially the prickly ones) can teach us about grace. I’m grateful for them, because they remind me that I’m still learning how to keep my own quills down.